Still alive
by Saaabric
Summary: She has never had someone, she couldn’t live without. Someone so real and pure that would seem unreal. Such a deep sensation that would leave you breathless just by thinking about it. Until now. ONESHOT EO!


**So yes, I'm here with another story for you guys. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it. It is a one shot. Thank you so much Jen, I love you. **

**Thanks to all the people who read and review! Enjoy the story...**

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She was practically used to feeling like she was dead. She knew it was something no-one would think of, how can someone possibly think they are dead? It was not a dark feeling. It was just an odd feeling, like if it was just too hard to breath. After all she has been through in her personal life as well as work, it was understandable to feel death. When she sat on her couch to think about her day at work, she started to remember every case, every victim, at least the ones who left a deep scar in her soul. And when she thought about it, she was just too tired to breath.

She was all alone in her life. She felt kind of depressed when she sat and thought about what she truly had, because the only thing that she truly had was her position at work, and it was something she didn't believe in anymore. It was not enough. She didn't want to feel like if working for Special Victim's Unit was her only belonging. She wanted to have so much.

That was just another moment when she was tired of breathing, she was at a point in her life that you would start realizing what you want and don't have. She has been in love many times in her life, but never truly felt like she was really in love. She has never had someone, she couldn't live without. Someone so real and pure that would seem unreal. Such a deep sensation that would leave you breathless just by thinking about it. Until now.

It was something she didn't want to think about, because when she did, she was just too tired to breath. The only person who was making her feel like this was, at the same time, a person that was leaving her without air. He was someone she couldn't stop thinking about, and when she did, something in her memories would make her remind herself about him. Something that is so beautiful, one of the most wonderful feelings of all, was just something too hard to feel. She has done everything in her power not to feel it. But it failed.

Olivia lifted her head from her hands when a similar scent was absorbed by her lungs. She was so tired of wanting him with such a passion that was making it hard for her to breath. She closed her eyes and thought about the only person she could think about.  
His eyes were her real mirror, because you could not only see your face in them, but you could see exactly what he is feeling. Those eyes she was tired of getting lost into. Those eyes that when they were having an argument, won just from the beginning. Those eyes she has seen so many times with tears or with anger and still looked just as beautiful.  
His lips were the only thing she would usually think about, the lips she wanted to so desperately kiss. Those lips that had yelled at her so many times. The lips that moved in a way that was making her crazy. She then realized she was tired of breathing again.

"Liv," her heart almost stopped when she heard his voice. But she was actually scared of looking at him; she was scared she would fall in love in an even deeper way. Reluctantly, she lifted her head from her arms and stared into his blue eyes. "Daydreaming again?" he asked once again in the same night, but this time he did it with one of his unique and bright smiles. She didn't want to see that at all, in fact, she just wanted to finish her paperwork and head home to sleep.

She nodded and closed her eyes and rested her head on the desk without minding if he was looking. She was so screwed. She didn't even know when this whole thing started, she didn't want to think about it anymore, but even if she didn't want to, he was all she could think about. He was in her thoughts, in her dreams, in her memories, he was everywhere. "Are you okay?" he asked this time a bit more worried than the last time. "You seem a bit distracted," He whispered turning off the computer in front of him. He had apparently finished his work. Olivia lifted her head from her desk once again and tried to focus on the reports. Her breathe was caught in her throat as she felt a warm hand on her shoulder.

"Take your coat and let's go," he said and took her coat waiting for her to stand up. The simple contact was one of the hardest parts for her. She wanted so much to walk away with him, but there was a lot of work she had not done yet and she couldn't allow herself to fall in love with him even more.

"I haven't finished yet," she felt like a complete idiot for not answering what she really wanted, but when he took her hand in his, she realized she was at a point with no return. She was at a point where everything seemed unreal. Elliot then took her other hand and smiled, she knew from that moment that he had something in mind. She let out a short sigh and spoke "Okay, let's go."

"It won't take too long, I promise," He said and helped her with her coat. She stood up thinking what was going to happen after she decided to go out with him. Her hands were as cold as ice and his hands were so warm, which were making hers melt. "Come on, let's go," he said as he placed a soft hand on her lower back as they walked away.  
Within minutes they were entering his car. She was anxious about this trip because she wanted to spend so much time with him, because she hasn't been able to lately. "Where are we going?" Olivia asked with curious. He obviously had something in mind, because this seemed something different from all the trips they've been through in the last nine years. His eyes were telling a different story, she could say, he looked happy and very sweet.

"You don't want to ruin the surprise," he whispered and gave her a wink. Her heart stopped in that second. It didn't matter where they were going as long as he was there with her right now. She didn't even notice when he parked the car next to the beach. She didn't know it looked so romantic at night. "We're here." They both got out of the car and looked around the beach. Why did he bring her there?

Elliot came from behind and hugged her tightly, wrapping his arms around her waist. She couldn't believe what he was doing; he had never touched her in a similar way. She closed her eyes as he kissed her neck softly, moving the hair that was making his actions difficult. "El," she started, but he broke apart and took her hand in his. She was as confused as ever, but didn't ask the reason for his actions.

"Let's walk," he proposed and they walked hand in hand along the beach. She was not accustom to it, but she had to admit, what she was doing with him, was the most romantic thing she has ever done. "I couldn't wait to be here with you," he said and stopped walking. She was getting lost in his eyes, in his hands, in the whole scene, but she didn't want to get charmed by his words, because she knew she was going to end up hurt. He could see the discomfort in her eyes "What is it?"  
Her sight fell to the sand and he placed his hand on her shoulder and smiled "You can tell me," he insisted again. He needed an answer. Several seconds passed by and he became more anxious, so he decided to take her face between his hands and ask once again.

"Tell me... What are you scared of?" He said wiping some tears away from her sad face.  
"I'm scare of this, El," she whispered and broke away from his grip, she was not ready for this, even if it was all she ever thought about. She walked a few steps backwards and wrapped her arms around her own body in an attempt to warm herself. "I'm scared of ending up being hurt again." Elliot walked near her again and pulled her hair behind her ears. "I know it's scary, but I'm ready for this and I need this, Liv," he placed his hand on her cheek and stroked it slowly. She bit her lip as some tears escaped from the corner of her eyes. "Don't cry," he whispered and she walked some steps backwards.  
"You don't understand," she kept on repeating. Olivia was so tired of this; she just wanted to be happy. She walked some meters away and laid on the sand, rubbing her eyes.

Elliot walked next to her and sat down beside her, touching her leg. "So tell me," he said with a smile on his face. "Because I'd give you everything you want, I would do anything for you, I would give up everything and anything for you." That was the sweetest thing someone has ever told her, and she was happy it was Elliot who said it.

"Sometimes, I'm tired of breathing… because this is just too much," she whispered. Elliot leaned in and kissed her for the first time. Her breathe was caught up in her throat and she wrapped her arms around his neck. Everything seemed to stop around them, the sound of the sea stopped, the sound of the wind stopped. They kissed for almost five minutes until he had to pull away for air. He wiped some tears from her face and leaned in again, this time capturing her lips in a more passionate kiss.

She then realized, it was not hard to breath any more.


End file.
